I beg your consideration as I take some time today for personal introspection.  I would like to give honor to the memory of someone for whom I have grieved deeply.

Today is a day of significance and remembrance for me.  Five years ago  today my mother-in-law, Ruth Babb, passed away.  She was 75, and a wonderful woman of faith.  I learned many things from her.

In dealing with loss of those I love, I try to remember and enumerate the things that I have learned from them. In the search for significance, I think the most that we can hope for is that we can leave behind something of value for those that follow.  I am not speaking of material or tangible things, but values and virtues that teach and bring depth to a life.

This godly woman taught me many things.  First of all, she raised my husband, who, of course, has had great impact on my life.  This man is a man of incredible strength and determination.  His grit and courage has taught me much about life, and it has brought much gain to my life.  His work ethic has made my life easy, because he has always been a good provider, which gave me the freedom to be home when I needed to be to raise my children.  He worked three jobs at times to grant me the privilege of being at home.  He is always in pursuit of excellence, which has raised the bar, not only for me, but as an example to our children.

I am very grateful to his mother for her influence in his life.  I discerned very quickly that he had inherited his strong courage from her.  As I came to know her, I learned that she had faced significant hardship in her own life, and had been faithful to stand strong in adversity.  She had been a rock for her children through many difficult years.  As a mother of nine children, she did not shirk her duty in raising her children, even though many times she was alone.  Her children have much for which to be thankful, as they had a mother who loved them and always did right by them.

I also saw incredible tenacity and faithfulness in her service to her husband.  Stricken with Alzheimer's in his latter years, he was quite dependent, and I watched her stand by him and care for him for a number of years.

I also observed her love for her children and grandchildren.  She had unconditional love for each of them, regardless of where they were in life.  Some of her children had made choices that were difficult to understand and caused hardship.  She always loved and did her best to be a godly mother.  I saw her embrace her children's spouses with that same love.  She always treated me as though I was one of her own.

In her latter years, after her husband's death, she served many of the elders in her church by spending time with them, giving them transportation to church and other places, and just being a friend.  Her servant's heart was a defining trait, and since her death, she has been greatly missed by those whom she served.

She always exemplified a contented Christian.  I observed that, although her circumstances were not ideal many times, she accepted and embraced those circumstances with beautiful grace, making the best of the situation, and even serving others when she might have had reason to complain.

I watched as Ruth battled heart disease and diabetes at the end of her life.  She had dealt with the diabetes for many years, but once the heart issues began, her body did not deal well with both diseases.  Her struggle was painful and heartrending to watch.  She finally decided that the physical struggle was not worth the fight, and she began to pray for relief.  I find it significant that she prayed for release from this life.  She was not afraid to meet her Maker.  In fact, she embraced that event with passion.  When we heard that she was praying for relief, we began to pray with her, asking for God's will.  In a matter of hours, God answered those prayers.  On Tuesday, February 26, 2008, she gained relief from her suffering.

In retrospect, I very much doubt that my mother-in-law regarded herself as a teacher.  She might be surprised to know that I see her as one of the best teachers I know.  In living her life, she became an example and role model to those around her.  I daresay that her children and grandchildren would say that she was a great teacher also.

I believe the greatest honor I could give would be to emulate and follow the principles which I have been taught by this precious lady.  Following her example and serving unselfishly would not only bring honor to her memory, but also impact her legacy.  I can affect the next generation the same way she affected mine.

I am so thankful for the precious memory of Ruth Babb.  May her legacy of service and love live on in me and my children.

It is the nature of desire not to be satisfied, and most men live only for the gratification of it.

-Aristotle

Gratefulness seems to be a lost art.  In our modern American culture, which is characterized by plenty, and I do mean plenty of everything, it is difficult to find gratefulness.  According to most of what we read and know, even the very poorest of Americans are much better off than much of the rest of the world.  

In a satiated society, it is not only difficult to find gratefulness, but it is difficult to teach and transfer that virtue to the next generation.  How do you teach someone to be thankful for what is always available and easily taken for granted?  Even though I have raised my children with many material blessings, I have tried to convey to them that these are not guaranteed, and that being grateful is a part of being content.  

It seems that the advertisement industry inspires discontent and the concept of never being satisfied, because the consumer "deserves" the best. The advertisements, which clamor for our attention, are always based on the idea that we should never be content, but always strive for more of everything, and if we happen to have everything, then we should look for the better version of everything.

In our dissatisfaction, we become convinced that the next thing that we are seeking will satisfy us, but in all reality, we are never satisfied.  This is because material things only fill a void for a space of time, and then our human spirit is looking for something fresh and new to inspire and bring happiness.  Aristotle's quote is true.  We are born wanting and seeking; our entire lives are spent striving to fulfill our desires, and when our lives end, we are still seeking and looking for the next thing.

As I have grown older, I have come to realize that if I had everything my heart desired, I would soon become discontent and seek for more.  This is easily seen when we observe the lives of the "rich and famous" among us.  If material things and fame brought complete satisfaction, then those who have such things would never have need of mind altering drugs or alcohol to help them face life.  All too often, we see that those who seem to have the most in our society have the biggest problems dealing with life.  Could this be based in the fact that we have high expectations that fortune and fame should bring ultimate satisfaction?  When will we really come to the understanding that true contentment is a condition of the inner man and is a God given thing, not at all related to how many material things a person possesses?

It is ironic to me that the most contented people are the ones who have the fewest possessions.  Material things are demanding, and the more that we have, the more we must do to take care of these things.  When you look at the lives of those who have much and those who have little, it is interesting that satisfaction and contentment and thankfulness is not dependent on how much one possesses.  It is a condition of the heart.  Any one can choose to be content, can make a decision to be grateful and to live a life that reflects that gratefulness.  Gratefulness keeps us from becoming self centered and dissatisfied.  The focus in a thankful heart is on the giver, not on the gift or possession.

My goal is to be grateful every single day that I live.  I want to live a life that reflects gratefulness.  As I've pondered this, I realize that there are some areas in which I can improve.  I often gripe and complain about small petty things.  In my mind they are not really complaints, because it appears that I'm just stating the fact...that I am cold, or I am tired, or I have a headache, or my feet hurt, or I wish I had a better car, or more dark chocolate!  For someone who is truly grateful and filled with inner contentment, these things would be trivial and small, not necessarily topics of conversation.  I am not advocating that we never state that we are cold, or hungry, or tired. I just think that it would be good to step back and get perspective.  I dare say that someone in a third world country would gladly trade places with me and bear the things about which I complain without saying a word.  It really is all about perspective.  A mature well rounded individual seeks to gain perspective, and strives to get out of the narrow rut or mind set that is the result of a life lived selfishly and directed inward instead of outward.

I am striving to be more grateful.  I want to live in a world that is filled with thankfulness and thankful people. A culture of grateful people is a kind culture, a generous society, a family that is constantly aware of our dependence on God and a dependence on and mutual need for each other.

Let's start a revolution of thankfulness!  I'll start today by being thankful for you, the reader of my blog.  I am very grateful that you have taken the time to read and reflect on my latest speech made from my "soap box." I am also thankful for the wonderful privilege of being an American.  I am thankful for my heritage that is rich in love and trust.  I am thankful for my family and for the God who has blessed me with all these things, and I am grateful for chocolate!